 Originally written for the Centre for Christian Formation and Discipleship. “When prayer becomes an encounter with the living God, it becomes unpredictable.” – Robert Marsh
No matter how my mildly autistic son might try, he can’t quite put himself into another person’s shoes. He’s very good at telling you how you should feel, and very bad at accepting that you might have a different perspective or feelings. The psychological term for this is mind-blindness. Apparently, we are all mind-blind until about age four, but for those on the autistic spectrum, it is a forever battle. My son has accepted the fact that another’s brain is filled with differing content, reactions and emotions, but his living into that reality is an ongoing challenge. We are not so different from my son when we approach God in prayer...  Originally written for the Centre for Christian Formation and Discipleship. “Prayer is not so much an activity so much as it is a way of life.” - Margaret Blackie
The Examen is not meant to be merely a prayer practice; it’s a way of being in the world and with God. Engage it with understanding and you might find it one of the greatest gifts your soul has ever received. And, I don’t write that lightly. Eight years ago, I received the directive to practice this method of prayer like an allergy attack...  Jose y Maria - illustration by Everett Patterson (used with permission) Celebrating Epiphany: This Ain't Your Mother's Nativity Scene... (Originally written for the Centre for Christian Formation and Discipleship.) Perhaps no part of the Christian story has been “Disney-fied” more than the Twelve Days of Christmas, ending in Epiphany. (January 6th) Epiphany is a Christian feast day which commemorates the visit of the Magi to the Christ child.* As a little girl living near New Orleans, all I knew of Epiphany was that it came with cake. King Cake!  New Orleans is famous for Mardi Gras, a carnival season with elaborate floats, music, and parties. Mardi Gras means ‘Fat Tuesday’, which refers to the last day of eating rich food before the fasting season of Lent. At my school, the week before Mardi Gras meant the launch of a sugar-fest! The teacher brought in the first King Cake. We each munched our sugary piece with care until one child declared, “I found it!” A tiny, plastic baby Jesus was hoisted in the air for all to see. That lucky child brought in the next cake…the next day! This went on all week! Looking back, I don’t remember how my teacher managed a class full of Southern children on a week-long sugar-rush. Perhaps we were told the cake symbolized the wiseman’s search for baby Jesus; I cannot recall. But I can promise you, there was no mention of the next part of the story… where Joseph flees in the night with his young family after the angel warns of King Herod’s plot to kill Jesus. There was no mention that Jesus became a political refugee in Egypt for five (estimated) years. There most certainly is no mention of the slaughter of innocent babies in Bethlehem that followed. It would have ruined our appetite for cake.
“Epiphany shows us that Jesus has always been someone controversial, longed for, unagreed upon, feared, argued about, sought out and sought after.” – Fr. Rohr  Clashes of Ideology and the Invitation to Love... (Originally written for the Centre for Christian Formation and Discipleship.) This quote by F. Scott Fitzgerald always makes me think: “The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposing ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function.” How would you say your nation is currently passing Fitzgerald’s test? How about our world? Across the globe, humanity is collectively holding the tension of warring ideologies: beliefs, philosophies, systems of thought, politics, economics, controversies, etc. Our families, societies, communities, the Church, and our nations bear this strain bodily. I’d suggest that we are not functioning well. I’ll admit, there are days, I don’t function either. How about you? If you’re like me, you long for relief from the stress, the unknowns, and the subtle adrenaline created by disturbing news, daily death tolls, and social media arguments. But, I don’t see that happening anytime soon. So, what if we viewed the deep disagreements of the world as a counter-intuitive opportunity?  It’s at this fragile point of connection, where one opposing idea meets the other, that the deepest invitation to love is offered… because that oppositional thought always comes with bones and skin on it, in the form of another person...
Part 1 of a 2 Part Series on Listening as a Spiritual Discipline by Tonya Stanfield  Photo Credit: Lia Filles (https://liafillies.blogspot.com) “Listen to the voice of the Land; to the voice of the minority; to the voice of the creative ones; to all our relations. Listen twice as much as you speak. Speak life and beauty.” – Joel Calabrese It was an accident… an unexpected stumbling into a modern-day New Testament church. Sort of. It was actually a converted warehouse in a dodgy Cape Town suburb. I was attending a workshop on Christian nonviolent activism when the peace-award-winning speaker was cut short by black pain spilling out of its floodgates.
For the next two hours, we white people listened (squirming, uncomfortable, some looking toward the exits) while 400+ years of historic hurt was voiced with anger and tears. (Twenty-five years after Apartheid, South Africa still has the greatest economic disparity between the races on the planet.) At one point, a young man from a township raised his shirt and compared the scars on his side to Jesus’. His were a result of a blade and gang violence. Another eloquent and enraged young woman described the daily violence her mother endures: Her shack has no running water, so she makes do with a bucket bath and communal outhouse. Yet, she cleans a white woman’s grand bathroom … Every day. She cares for white children in safe neighborhoods while her own are often left unattended in her township. Year after year. Then, the angry, articulate young woman stated, “And, my mother doesn’t steal from them, doesn’t kill them! That’s nonviolence!” Do you feel uncomfortable? Or empowered? The answer would depend on the story inside you... Part 2 of a 2 part series on Listening as a Spiritual Discipline by Tonya Stanfield  Photo Credit: Ruth Smith Photography Do you know what the neurological polar opposite of love is? Neurosciences have discovered the opposing reaction to love in the human brain… and it’s not hate or fear, as you might think. It’s disgust! That’s right, the neurological polar opposite of love is disgust..   A Prayerful Way to Weather a Pandemic... (Originally written for the Centre for Christian Formation and Discipleship.) From the beginning of time, chaos has not been feared by God, but is rather the element from which the Spirit created… and still does. As never before, we are in the midst of a pandemic of uncertainty, a shared fear of global chaos.
We need to be anchored. I need to be anchored. I need to be anchored to the One who will hold me firm, lest the chaos of current events sweep away my peace and goodwill toward humankind. Perhaps you feel the same? Stage 4, 5, 6 - Are you a Critic, Seer, or Saint?  Written by Tonya Stanfield, this is Part 4 of a 4 part series, “Stages of Faith and Spiritual Crisis: How to recognize it; disciple it; or find hope as you journey through it." (Originally written for the Centre for Christian Formation and Discipleship.) Burn-out. Crossroads. Identity crisis. Break down. Wilderness season. Mid-life crisis. Back-sliding....
We’ve all got different names for spiritual crisis. Some have less bite (and possibly less honesty) than others. Spiritual crisis is hard, but it can be good news! The temptation is to assuage someone’s doubt and tuck them right back into the fold as quickly as possible. But, properly viewed, it’s really an invitation to explore the deeper depths of God and come into your truer identity...  Written by Tonya Stanfield, this is Part 3 of a 4 part series, “Stages of Faith and Spiritual Crisis: How to recognize it; disciple it; or find hope as you journey through it." (Originally written for the Centre for Christian Formation and Discipleship.) If you were to step into a fish tank, who would be the last to know he was in water? The fish? Or you?  The answer: The fish. Because the fish has lived the entirety of its life submerged, it has no concept that there is any other environment possible. We are all much like that fish as we live submerged in our own world-views, cultures, and faith communities. We can also live submerged in our stage of faith.
Dr. James Fowler, the architect of the Stages of Faith theory, encourages us to be “playfully serious” with his model. One way to do that is to use it as tool for pointing out our blind spots. It can show us the kind of water we are currently submerged in....  Written by Tonya Stanfield, this is Part 2 of a 4 part series, “Stages of Faith and Spiritual Crisis: How to recognize it; disciple it; or find hope as you journey through it." (Originally written for the Centre for Christian Formation and Discipleship.)
When my brother was three, he wanted to be a boa constrictor. As an adult, he settled on becoming a doctor. At my son’s kindergarten graduation, the kids announced their future, grown-up careers: “Marine biologist.” “Architect.” Three kids in a row declared they would be archers! Every kid, from potential doctors to boa constrictors, was 100% confident this could be the trajectory of their lives. We adults weren’t going to tell the kid who wants to be a snake that it’s time to face reality. We know, as they mature, they’re going to figure out life isn’t all that simple. Archery won’t pay the bills. Humans can’t grow scales. Medical school is expensive. It’s still possible—except for the scales—but to achieve it, you’ve got to be realistic about the path you’re embarking on.
Like those kids, believers have an inner, unconscious picture of what we think Christian growth and maturing should look like. This unarticulated, inner ideal both drives us and shames us. It tells us what kind of Christian we “should” be. Most of us live unaware that it’s even talking to us. Its voice is full of measurements and comparison. What does your inner imagination tell you about what the path of Christian maturing should look like? |
Tonya...also has a teaching, writing, and speaking ministry. Her heart is to raise, deepen, and challenge disciples of Jesus. She's part of the Center for Christian Formation and Discipleship and lectures at both a Masters and Undergraduate level for YWAM's University of the Nations. She's also training to be a spiritual director and is an enneagram coach. We thought you might enjoy some of her blogs... Archives
June 2021
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